Saturday 9: Spooky

Saturday 9: Spooky

1. Does anything about Halloween “spook” you? Clowns. Of course clowns spook me out on a normal day too, so I'm not sure if that counts or not.

2. What is the favorite costume you have ever worn for Halloween? The 1950's Poodle skirt outfit my mom made for me when I was about 10 or 12 years-old. She made the pink skirt with the black poodle for me. I had the shirt with the "bobby socks" and saddle shoes. We pulled my hair up into a pony tail (nothing all that new for me then or now to be honest with you) and I was a very convincing 1950's girl.

3. What is your favorite thing about Halloween? Candy

4. What one topic is (or was) the most painful to discuss with your parents? Why? Every topic that has never been broached with them - such as every time I was abused, misused or assaulted. Of which they don't know about most of them, either because I didn't tell them or because they ignored the signs because it was easier for them.

5. What was the happiest day of your life? Do you think you'll ever top it? I don't know that I've had one happiest day of my life. I've had many happy days but none that stand out or jump out as "this was the happiest day of my life".

6. What animal would you like to be able to communicate with? All of them.

7. In what way do you come nearest to perfection (as you define it)? I will never come close to perfection as I define it. I am a perfectionist and I have OCD pretty severe. Perfection is not in the cards for me. It simply is not anything close to attainable.

8. Do you have any recurring nightmares? I have more recurring nightmares than I can count. Some are based on fact. Some simply have terrifying people from my past in them. Either way, they all revolve around my PTSD and cause me to wake in a cold sweat with a migraine.

9. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be and why? I would make my mother more involved. My father less afraid of me and what others would think of me being a daddy's girl, since again mom was self-absorbed and neglectful, once I hit puberty. I would get them both to leave the cult year before my little brother ever came along because it effected me too. I would make them both more perceptive and less concerned with what people would think if they took me to a child psychologist. I would make them believe me when I went to them about the abuse and molestation. And those are just for a start...